Thank you all so much for your questions on twitter - it's good to talk.
You can always send me your questions to me @rubywax with #AskRuby
@olivia_nathan
@Rubywax #askruby what do you believe to be the biggest misconception/stigma surrounding mental health today?
That it’s our imagination. That if we could just ‘perk up’ or ‘pull ourselves together’ or ‘pull our finger out’ (that’s a good one. A finger out of what?) we’d be perfectly fine. If any other organ went down you’d get sympathy cards, but not the brain.
@maidenmum
@Rubywax Do you have any specific advice/tips/ mindfulness excercises for the extreme emotions and anxiety in menopause. Thank you.#AskRuby
Try and focus on the exact area you’ve got physical sensations in your body. This pulls your focus from thinking about how anxious you are which only makes you more anxious. Rumination about why you’re anxious doubles the agony.
@StudentMindsOrg
@Rubywax #AskRuby - do you have any tips for university students dealing with depression?
Watch this. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QHIR3UVIoNU&feature=youtu.be
Get to a doctor - you can’t cope with depression on your own and if you get a bad feeling about him get to another doctor. Use your gut instinct but get help. Don’t try and sweat it out.
@EloiseAStark
@Rubywax #AskRuby What would you do if you noticed a friend seemed depressed or withdrawn?
Ask if they want help if they want, if they do get them help, if they tell you to piss off there’s nothing you can do but keep your eye on them and keep your compassion pumping.
@JPGSheedy
@Rubywax Do you think the 1 in 4 stat has at times alienated those of us with severe conditions by diminishing it as common place? #AskRuby
No
@LivveyKirtley
.@Rubywax Is there anything specific you think researchers can do to help #endstigma? #AskRuby
As soon as researchers discover what’s malfunctioning in the brain the faster it will be for us to say, “Look there it is as clear as a tumour so now shut up and don’t you dare try and fire me at work or give me a hard time or I’ll sue you.”
@annaros93001241
#AskRuby Hi Ruby, I love your books!! My boyfriend has depression, what can I do to help him when he's down?
If he really has depression rather than a bad, sad mood get him to a doctor but make sure the doctor’s qualified in psychiatry. You obviously care about him by asking the question; he’s lucky to have you.
@strangelymillsy
#AskRuby how would you advise someone in asking for support from their work when they are dealing with depression?
There must be someone in HR who deals with that situation. If not, why not? If you feel your job might be in jeopardy, call Sane and speak to someone who can advise you on your legal rights. Sane.org.uk
@SaskiaIseard
@Rubywax is it possible to practise mindfulness during a busy commute & how? Going to your show tomorrow, looking forward to it! #AskRuby
I practice it on the tube or in a queue when it’s not moving or on holding on the phone to music that could drive you more mental than you are. Just for a minute focus on the sound of the train or the taste of coffee. In that minute you take the focus from the thoughts to your sense where there is only sensation no nagging.
If you read my book “Frazzled,” I give suggestions on how you can wedge it into a busy day. Everyone has a at least a minute in their day when they’re not doing something or else we’d all be institutionalized.
@kcb1
@Rubywax #AskRuby I have read ur book and want to practice mindfulness but get caught up in daily life. Any advice how to change this?
Daily life is exactly when you could practice mindfulness. We don’t have anything else but our daily lives. If you notice you’re autopilot when you want to be present for something, mindfulness helps you pull into that gear. Use it or your life could just pass as a blur.
@gem82running
@Rubywax do you think mental illness is compatible with a stressful job or is it asking for trouble?Thx for the walk in,it was fab #AskRuby
Mental illness has nothing to do with a job, it’s a disease, not caused by stress. People work so hard and long they can burn out but that’s different than mental illness. You can have it even if you’ve never lifted a finger; even if you’re living on an island with room service it still hits 1 in 4. That should make you feel better.
@KiddGraeme
@Rubywax where's your favourite venue/place to perform comedy? #AskRuby
I know this might sound weird but I love performing in mental institutions. It feels like I’m with my people, I’m safe because they know they’re of my tribe. They laugh even when something’s not funny. I’m so grateful.
@graeme123s
@Rubywax #askruby Please explain about your mum vacuuming with her teeth - How/Why? Just finished Frazzled - loved it!
That was a joke. She vacuumed with her nostrils.
@leesapollo
@Rubywax #AskRuby I worry about fitting daily mindfulness in. I'm managing the 10mins each morning but wondered how long u spend each day?
10 minutes is a great achievement - most people can’t do a second. I spend about 10 minutes scattered throughout the day, even in the bathroom.
@StevePersonally
@Rubywax number one recommendation for me supporting a bipolar lady (doing pretty ok) #askruby
Stand by her through her highs and lows - which there will be a great number of, so hold onto your hat.
@rachredgate
@Rubywax How did you first come across mindfulness? #AskRuby
I read that it has the best results for preventing relapse of depression so I dove in that pool.
@Dream_on_Alex
@Rubywax can I use mindfulness to help me have a deeper sleep? #AskRuby
Yes, it stops the ruminating and that’s what keeps you up; those thoughts churning over and over again and the bitch is that there will never be an answer however much you churn. Mindfulness helps you cool it on the churning
@coxiegirl
@Rubywax #AskRuby and are you planning to tour with Frazzled?
Yes - I’ll be touring the UK starting in April. I’ll give you dates on rubywax.net/tour next week.
Karen Cox @coxiegirl
@Rubywax #AskRuby how can i get my kids to practice mindfulness regularly?
Good luck getting them to practice even once. Most kids will rebel whatever you tell them. I know my kids think I’m an atrocity of nature. Just do it yourself and they’ll pick up that you’re being calmer in the storms and may even ask you what you’re doing to get there.
@slabss
@Rubywax can one practice mindfulness without meditation? #AskRuby
It is meditation but without the Buddhist thing going on you don’t have to wear a robe or sit on a gulten free cushion. Yes, you got it.
@flyingkipper
@Rubywax What is the most helpful piece of advice you could give someone with #depression? #AskRuby #mentalhealth #mentalillness
Get to a doctor who can give you the right medication and later add some CBT when you feel better. If you’re really down, just give yourself a break and wait for the demon to leave.
@jeanjobling
#AskRuby how can I quieten the mind at night to help sleep?
Do mindfulness if you can or just distract yourself; read something really boring or focus anywhere you can but on your thoughts. They are the great preventer of sleep.
@screemer75
@Rubywax did you experience physical symptoms when first practising meditation #askruby
No just the mental agony of looking in on my thoughts which is part of the process. If you don’t know what’s going on in there, you’re at the mercy of it.
@susank2
#AskRuby top tips to maintain serenity when presenting to 120 colleagues at conference when brain sending "fight or flight" message to body!
Focus on breathing or the feel of your feet where they contact the ground. If you focus on a physical sense, the thoughts cool down from the horrors of what might happen which isn’t going to help the situation – ever. It’s the only way to deal with scariness as far as I’ve seen.
You can always send me your questions to me @rubywax with #AskRuby
@olivia_nathan
@Rubywax #askruby what do you believe to be the biggest misconception/stigma surrounding mental health today?
That it’s our imagination. That if we could just ‘perk up’ or ‘pull ourselves together’ or ‘pull our finger out’ (that’s a good one. A finger out of what?) we’d be perfectly fine. If any other organ went down you’d get sympathy cards, but not the brain.
@maidenmum
@Rubywax Do you have any specific advice/tips/ mindfulness excercises for the extreme emotions and anxiety in menopause. Thank you.#AskRuby
Try and focus on the exact area you’ve got physical sensations in your body. This pulls your focus from thinking about how anxious you are which only makes you more anxious. Rumination about why you’re anxious doubles the agony.
@StudentMindsOrg
@Rubywax #AskRuby - do you have any tips for university students dealing with depression?
Watch this. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QHIR3UVIoNU&feature=youtu.be
Get to a doctor - you can’t cope with depression on your own and if you get a bad feeling about him get to another doctor. Use your gut instinct but get help. Don’t try and sweat it out.
@EloiseAStark
@Rubywax #AskRuby What would you do if you noticed a friend seemed depressed or withdrawn?
Ask if they want help if they want, if they do get them help, if they tell you to piss off there’s nothing you can do but keep your eye on them and keep your compassion pumping.
@JPGSheedy
@Rubywax Do you think the 1 in 4 stat has at times alienated those of us with severe conditions by diminishing it as common place? #AskRuby
No
@LivveyKirtley
.@Rubywax Is there anything specific you think researchers can do to help #endstigma? #AskRuby
As soon as researchers discover what’s malfunctioning in the brain the faster it will be for us to say, “Look there it is as clear as a tumour so now shut up and don’t you dare try and fire me at work or give me a hard time or I’ll sue you.”
@annaros93001241
#AskRuby Hi Ruby, I love your books!! My boyfriend has depression, what can I do to help him when he's down?
If he really has depression rather than a bad, sad mood get him to a doctor but make sure the doctor’s qualified in psychiatry. You obviously care about him by asking the question; he’s lucky to have you.
@strangelymillsy
#AskRuby how would you advise someone in asking for support from their work when they are dealing with depression?
There must be someone in HR who deals with that situation. If not, why not? If you feel your job might be in jeopardy, call Sane and speak to someone who can advise you on your legal rights. Sane.org.uk
@SaskiaIseard
@Rubywax is it possible to practise mindfulness during a busy commute & how? Going to your show tomorrow, looking forward to it! #AskRuby
I practice it on the tube or in a queue when it’s not moving or on holding on the phone to music that could drive you more mental than you are. Just for a minute focus on the sound of the train or the taste of coffee. In that minute you take the focus from the thoughts to your sense where there is only sensation no nagging.
If you read my book “Frazzled,” I give suggestions on how you can wedge it into a busy day. Everyone has a at least a minute in their day when they’re not doing something or else we’d all be institutionalized.
@kcb1
@Rubywax #AskRuby I have read ur book and want to practice mindfulness but get caught up in daily life. Any advice how to change this?
Daily life is exactly when you could practice mindfulness. We don’t have anything else but our daily lives. If you notice you’re autopilot when you want to be present for something, mindfulness helps you pull into that gear. Use it or your life could just pass as a blur.
@gem82running
@Rubywax do you think mental illness is compatible with a stressful job or is it asking for trouble?Thx for the walk in,it was fab #AskRuby
Mental illness has nothing to do with a job, it’s a disease, not caused by stress. People work so hard and long they can burn out but that’s different than mental illness. You can have it even if you’ve never lifted a finger; even if you’re living on an island with room service it still hits 1 in 4. That should make you feel better.
@KiddGraeme
@Rubywax where's your favourite venue/place to perform comedy? #AskRuby
I know this might sound weird but I love performing in mental institutions. It feels like I’m with my people, I’m safe because they know they’re of my tribe. They laugh even when something’s not funny. I’m so grateful.
@graeme123s
@Rubywax #askruby Please explain about your mum vacuuming with her teeth - How/Why? Just finished Frazzled - loved it!
That was a joke. She vacuumed with her nostrils.
@leesapollo
@Rubywax #AskRuby I worry about fitting daily mindfulness in. I'm managing the 10mins each morning but wondered how long u spend each day?
10 minutes is a great achievement - most people can’t do a second. I spend about 10 minutes scattered throughout the day, even in the bathroom.
@StevePersonally
@Rubywax number one recommendation for me supporting a bipolar lady (doing pretty ok) #askruby
Stand by her through her highs and lows - which there will be a great number of, so hold onto your hat.
@rachredgate
@Rubywax How did you first come across mindfulness? #AskRuby
I read that it has the best results for preventing relapse of depression so I dove in that pool.
@Dream_on_Alex
@Rubywax can I use mindfulness to help me have a deeper sleep? #AskRuby
Yes, it stops the ruminating and that’s what keeps you up; those thoughts churning over and over again and the bitch is that there will never be an answer however much you churn. Mindfulness helps you cool it on the churning
@coxiegirl
@Rubywax #AskRuby and are you planning to tour with Frazzled?
Yes - I’ll be touring the UK starting in April. I’ll give you dates on rubywax.net/tour next week.
Karen Cox @coxiegirl
@Rubywax #AskRuby how can i get my kids to practice mindfulness regularly?
Good luck getting them to practice even once. Most kids will rebel whatever you tell them. I know my kids think I’m an atrocity of nature. Just do it yourself and they’ll pick up that you’re being calmer in the storms and may even ask you what you’re doing to get there.
@slabss
@Rubywax can one practice mindfulness without meditation? #AskRuby
It is meditation but without the Buddhist thing going on you don’t have to wear a robe or sit on a gulten free cushion. Yes, you got it.
@flyingkipper
@Rubywax What is the most helpful piece of advice you could give someone with #depression? #AskRuby #mentalhealth #mentalillness
Get to a doctor who can give you the right medication and later add some CBT when you feel better. If you’re really down, just give yourself a break and wait for the demon to leave.
@jeanjobling
#AskRuby how can I quieten the mind at night to help sleep?
Do mindfulness if you can or just distract yourself; read something really boring or focus anywhere you can but on your thoughts. They are the great preventer of sleep.
@screemer75
@Rubywax did you experience physical symptoms when first practising meditation #askruby
No just the mental agony of looking in on my thoughts which is part of the process. If you don’t know what’s going on in there, you’re at the mercy of it.
@susank2
#AskRuby top tips to maintain serenity when presenting to 120 colleagues at conference when brain sending "fight or flight" message to body!
Focus on breathing or the feel of your feet where they contact the ground. If you focus on a physical sense, the thoughts cool down from the horrors of what might happen which isn’t going to help the situation – ever. It’s the only way to deal with scariness as far as I’ve seen.
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