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#AskRuby August 2015

27/8/2015

1 Comment

 
Lots and lots of #AskRuby answers for you... thank you all so much for your questions, I love them.  You can ask me anything over on twitter - just add #AskRuby.


Remember, if you want to be the first to hear about my new book and other things, just tell me where to get in touch. 

Liz Meddings @lzmddngs
#askruby do you still think that we shouldn't tell our employers about our mental health issues?
- Tread carefully-employers aren’t allowed to fire you if you have mental illness but sadly tragically employees find themselves axed for no apparent reason. No one would dare fire someone physically disabled but if it’s mental – it it still evokes fear that you might suddenly go berserk on the job like Norman Bates.

Lee Rowlands @SaladDodgersBBQ
@Rubywax Do you think a healthy diet can improve some mental health conditions? #askruby 
- A diet can prevent you getting over-hyped with all that sugar and flavoured crap we’re fed but with a mental illness like bi-polar or schizophrenia, I’d say what you eat isn’t going to make any difference unless you count medication as a food.
 
Chris @Chris_Ware_BGC
@Rubywax hi Ruby will you be involved with the Abfab movie? Thanks for all you do :) x #askruby  
- When Jennifer picks up her plume and writes something, I shall do whatever it is I do. (She’s the genius, I just come in and do some light dusting.)

lowering my BMI @fatbirdslim2015
@Rubywax teenagers - challenging teenagers - how to get them to engage in therapy ? #MentalHealthAwareness #askruby
- Funny you should ask, in my new book coming out in January, I give all that information.  Thanks for giving me an opening to plug it.  A small tip - Tell them if they get help, they’ll get better exam results without ending up crazed to capacity.
 
Helen @HLF_1983
@Rubywax How would you go about approaching a young adult who you feel may have a mental health issue, without offending them? #AskRuby
- Send them an email and if they don’t respond, back off. Don’t tell them to ‘perk up’,if you do they’ll never speak to you again. Also, it would help that you tell them about your problems first whatever they may be.

Emma Shaw @handylibrarian
@Rubywax Do you sometimes find mindfulness exercises had to do, like when having a real bad day. Do you have strategies for this? #askruby
- If the day is REALLY bad, skip the exercises.  The main point of mindfulness is to learn not to give yourself a hard time - so get off your own back.  

Guy Lambert @SohoGuy
@Rubywax when writing your book, did you feel like you were on a journey of self-discovery? Were you a different person by the end? #askruby
- If you’re knee deep in this stuff every day for a few years, your brain changes just like it says on the mindfulness label. I feel like I’ve had a mental make-over, I’m not so needy and I don’t feel so alone anymore even if I am alone.

vog @orlsy_
@Rubywax are you always taking medication? Or do you take your meds when you feel you need them? #askruby
- They aren’t like aspirins that you take at the first sign of madness to make the bad stuff go away.  If you go on and off them when you feel like it, that could seriously screw up your health far more than if you just stayed on them. 
 
Sunny @Betteaconda
@Rubywax what was it like to interview Bette Midler? #askruby
- Once you crack someone’s celebrity shell, you can really see them as they are when they were still human. With Bette she was my dream girl; hilarious, self-deprecating, gutsy and gave me the greatest gift by singing her hit songs down the Harrods escalators and telling me her life story in the fish department.


Jeremy Thorne @JezzaThorne
@Rubywax Will you be writing an article about your silent retreat? It sounded wonderful (if you pardon the pun). :) #askruby
- It’s going to be my blog next week in the Huffington Post, thanks for asking.


starlinguk @starlinguk
@Rubywax How do you deal with traumatic experiences? I had a horrific experience yesterday and I don't know what to do with it. #askruby

- It depends on how you define a trauma.  Having a bad day in Afghanistan or living on benefits? Or having a bad hair day?  If it’s the first or thereabouts get some EMDR (trauma) therapy, if it’s the haircut go back and make them fix it.

@Jollyphonic
@Rubywax Will your new book have info on how to help teens diagnosed with depression/anxiety? #AskRuby
- Yes, yes, yes - I give exercises for how teens to deal with their dark sides and even give them some exist strategies. 

@AshleighPOwen
@Rubywax #askruby how many times do you do mindfulness per day and how long are your sessions? X
- In the morning 20-30 minutes and then later in the day when I’m someplace where I can’t really do anything but sit or stand; as in a taxi, tube, train, queue or while getting a bad haircut, then I’ll meditate. 

 @trevtall
@Rubywax #askruby what do you believe to be the most effective treatment for depression?
- We’re all different –what works for someone, drives the next person up the wall.  For me it’s the m and m’s that’s saving my ass. (medication n’ meditation).  

@GazPMatter
@Rubywax If you were a superhero from planet Depressive what would your special power be (find a positive aspect of depression) #AskRuby?
- To be able to make instant beds for those people who feel they can’t get out of theirs. Also I’d create the perfect medication that works for the whole planet and has no bad side effects. 

@keirshiels
@Rubywax what lesson would you want to teach new doctors about mental health? #AskRuby
- Listen to your patients; don’t brush them off with some generic pills or say something flippant like “It will pass, don’t worry” People need to talk, if you don’t have time, send them to someone who will. 

@rock_disco
@Rubywax #askruby How can I get involved with your campaign to have walk in mental health centres across the country? By the way you rock. J
- I’m going to start my mission to open walk in centres in October and I’ll need help so please get in touch then, I’ll tweet about it. And thank you.
 
 @artbymelgraham
@Rubywax #askruby Ruby how do you put aside the awful feeling of failure when you hit a low after a period of smiles.... #depression
- If I get that familiar tune that plays the ‘failure song’ in my head, I try to remember that it’s just an old recording from when I was young and felt like a flop. Now, I know I have the option to let it play on without me having to sing along.  

@ben_jweb
@Rubywax If somebody has been practicing CBT/mindfulness for a while and has found it v helpful is stopping SSRIs ever an option? #AskRuby
- Research shows that a high percentage of people who practice CBT/mindfulness can eventually cut out the anti-depressants but if you aren’t in that group, don’t think you’re a failure. I don’t want to give medication a bad rap, it’s kept me on all 2’s for years.  It’s nothing to be ashamed about, just remember if you were a diabetic you wouldn’t give yourself a hard time for taking insulin.

@GeorgieMay_1
@Rubywax PLEASE PLEASE can I interview you for my MSC dissertation on mental health and the media? Even if it's just for 2 mins #askruby
- Come to where I’m performing  my tour of “Sane New World” in October/November and I’ll do it after the show.

 @SarahLeanne__
@Rubywax when is the right to (if ever) to come off medication? #askruby
- When your doctor tells you and tells you how to come off it.

@SarahLeanne__
@Rubywax is it really possible to achieve anything you want to when suffering with clinical depression? #askruby
- No, you can’t achieve anything  when you’re suffering why would you even try?  If you’re not going to be nice to you, who is?
@gillassocs
#askruby Was at your final London show last year & asked a question. You were eating with D. Suchet but sent me down £6 for a G&T. Thanks! T
- I remember, it was at the St. James Theatre - thanks for the drink do you want the £6 back? I could send you a cheque.

@ehurrell5
@Rubywax you politely moved me out the way last night so you could run up the stairs at ROH. Curious...what was the bet? #benfolds #askruby
- The bet was could I beat my friends to the top of the Opera House. They were taking the elevator; I was taking the stairs.  This is how I have fun in real life.


@mitchmul
@Rubywax how often do u go back to America? #askruby
- I’m going for ‘Burning Man’ next week.  Something that extreme would be my only reason to go back.  I used to go for late night shopping but now it’s here (hurrah!) so I don’t need to.

@MarcusRaymond1
@Rubywax Petition for mental health education to be introduced to national curriculum. Good idea? RT? petition.parliament.uk/petitions/1045… #askruby
- That’s a great idea. There are programs in schools now that teach kid’s emotional intelligence and how to deal with pressure – this helps them live a better life rather than just getting higher grades in courses they’ll never remember when they grow up.
 
@pacifistfighter
@Rubywax #askruby How do I motivate/end procrastination to finish your brilliant (so far) 'Sane New World'? Start by getting off twitter?
- Shut off your phone and computer and walk away or go somewhere with no wifi and bring along my book.  

@MarkOneinFour
Why as folk w/ #mentalhealth difficulty do you think we talk in imperatives given platform; telling others in same boat what to do? #askruby
- We can’t tell others what to do when we don’t know what the landscape is in their heads or how they see reality.  It’s all guesswork but we can at least show compassion and send up a little flag that says we’re not having the time of our lives either.

@liz_loves_cake
@Rubywax what do you do when you feel powerless when trying to make changes? #askruby
- I don’t think about it, I just keep moving forward until I get depressed then I go under, otherwise I’m like a bulldozer.

@liz_loves_cake
@Rubywax what makes you want to get up in the morning? #askruby
- I have to finish my new book and it’s due in a week. The fear of my publishers yelling at me.

@WEIRDCHRISTMAS
@Rubywax #askruby HOW ON EARTH DO YOU STAY SOOOOOOOOOOOO YOUNG LOOKING RUBY? pic.twitter.com/2qbsSjLQe5
- Botox

@UCLiGEM
Would you stand with us to fight against mental health stigma? @Rubywax #askruby #studentsformentalhealth #iGEM
- That’s what I’m doing.

@shtisandgiggles
@Rubywax my friend killed herself on Wednesday.  How do I get over this? I'm 22 and not ready #askruby

- I don’t have an answer that’s not a cliché like, “Time will heal the pain” or “She might feel it was her only option.”  My feeling is, that it’s horrific for you and those who knew her and I can’t imagine the agony that must be going on in your head and heart.  

@TanithNyx
@Rubywax Do you feel pigeon-holed into the mental illness gig? I mean, has it closed doors being open about it? Big Luv & Kudos :) #AskRuby
- My book and show “Sane New World” aren’t about mental illness, I wrote them for everyone who has a brain and wants to know why it has glitches and what to do about them.  

 @LmoLynne
@Rubywax how can I measure my mindfulness progress ? #askruby
- Each time you practice, you’re strengthening an area in your brain that gives you the ability to dodge some of those mental bullets when you’re caught in the high winds of self-criticism.  If you can do that you’ve made progress.
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