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#AskRuby 26 June 2014

26/6/2014

18 Comments

 
Here is this week's #AskRuby , if you need any more answers let me know your questions

1. Do you think counselling helps when in the midst of depression, or is it better left til later? 

To me, when you’re in the midst of depression your mind has been evacuated there’s no one at home. In those times you wouldn’t know therapy if it came up and hit you on the head.

2. @MichelHeller: best book/article/class you recommend for beginners to mindfulness? I've read #sanenewworld and I want to learn more. Thx.

“Mindfulness: Finding Peace in a Frantic World” by Mark Williams. He was my professor at Oxford, one of the founders of Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy, a genius and humble. (Rare combo). 

3. @missmusical3 : Did you experience depression as a child?

Yes, but back then no one knew that it existed, they checked my blood so many times hunting for a physical illness, I was sucked dry. 

4. @elenwebbpage : having trouble reconciling planning for the future and practicing living in the present - any tips?

You have to plan for the future or nothings going to happen, you’ll grind to a halt and sometimes it’s good to be present, to give yourself a gift for all that planning.

5. @WreckReceiver : Do you think happiness is overrated?

I think happiness means getting a burst of dopamine or endorphins and it feels so good, then it’s over as quick as it started, then you spend all your time ‘chasing the dragon’ for an even bigger hit and it’s just exhausting.
18 Comments

#AskRuby 5 June 2014

5/6/2014

4 Comments

 
Here are the answers to the latest #AskRuby in full.  You can send me questions to answer on twitter by tweeting @RubyWax and using #AskRuby

1. @McArevey We have/have had countless diet shows & Embarrassing Bodies clinics on TV. Where are the programmes looking at mental health?

@Rubywax It’s all about what’s in fashion and viewing figures. Obviously body mutations and over ‘cellulited’ people (want to be pc) are in and we are out.  When they run out of physical atrocities then maybe our day will come.

2.@WTarps:  I'm bipolar and been well on meds for 10 years.  Should I still put MH disability down on job apps in case I ever relapse?

@Rubywax Once you’ve said you’re bi-polar on your CV you can’t take it off again.   If you get caught lying they will burn you at the stake and take away your insurance

3. @mariloubluebell why do you think that you are so driven?

@Rubywax  I was raised by immigrants who were always fleeing from one place or another. I’m sure that’s why I’m driven; to stop moving forward means annihilation

4. @BobFlowerpot how do you forgive, and what does that mean? #AskRuby

@Rubywax You forgive by letting go of the hatred and the continuous story in your head that justifies it. However hard it is to forgive, it’s easier than carrying that weight.

5. @sianysianp Thanks for Hay, I worry that CBT is being used as some miracle fix within my local area - have you seen this happening? #AskRuby

@Rubywax Nothing works for everything and there is no miracle but at least there’s something other then GP’s tossing drugs at anyone who has a bad day willy-nill.  At least now you get a human face to talk to and talking plus medication really is the cure. Maybe someday you can get other therapies but one step at a time.

6. @JPeacock101  are you coming birmingham on your tour next year ;o)

@Rubywax You can see all my tour dates here http://www.rubywax.net/tour.html
4 Comments

#Ask Ruby 22 May 2014

29/5/2014

2 Comments

 
Here are the answers to the latest #AskRuby in full.  You can send me questions to answer on twitter by tweeting @RubyWax and using #AskR

mark langford ‏@langford_mark 
@Rubywax #AskRuby what are your reading? apart from tweets...

I’m reading books about the brain to figure out how to make mine better; they make me feel like I’m feeding it.  I like David Eagleman’s stuff.

 MillyMollyMandy ‏@Amandastock1 
@Rubywax will you be doing another tour? Please come to Chelmsford! #askruby

I’m going to be at the Edinburgh Festival August 1-7 then starting another tour in September www.rubywax.net/tour. I will tour until hopefully I hit every crevice and protrusion in the UK. I am a driven woman.

 Rosemary Channin ‏@RosemaryChannin 
@Rubywax What were the best and worst parts of the Oxford Mindfulness course? I'm thinking of applying at some stage #AskRuby

The best bit was I had Mark Williams as a professor who is one of the founders of Mindfulness Based Cognitive Therapy so I learned from the horse’s mouth. The worst bits are trying to write a dissertation with some confidence when you know you got a D in English in High School.

 Sooper8 ‏@Sooper8 
@Rubywax #askruby Is Mindfulness a radical political ideology ? And if not , should it/could it be?

Absolutely not. Practicing mindfulness sharpens up your mental muscles so you can pay ‘attention’ to what you want to focus on. Not easy when your brain is going 2,000 miles on hour dragging you through an endless list that never ends.

 Charlotte Warwick ‏@teacakeuk 
@Rubywax #askruby Do you think they'll ever repeat 'Girls on Top'? I loved that show!!

I hope not, we were not in our right minds.

 miss musical ‏@missmusical3 
@Rubywax Do you think being in the public eye makes your mental health issues harder to deal with? #AskRuby.

It’s hard to deal with mental illness whatever eye you’re in; public or private. First, you feel you have to hide it and when you do get busted for having it they burn you at the stake metaphorically.

 Pete Burns ‏@PeteBurnsICON 
@Rubywax what are your views on ECT #AskRuby

What works for one person can seriously screw up the next. I have friends who had Electro convulsive therapy and got over their depression then other’s who disappeared in a fog. 

 lee boyle ‏@slowliving1 
@Rubywax hey Ruby, would you recommend long-term medication for depression? #AskRuby

Who am I to say? Each man for him self.  If you have a real mental disease (I don’t mean you’re a little sad) then I say you need as much as a diabetic needs insulin. I wouldn’t tell them to not take it and it’s the same with depression.  With depression I’d add the therapy, you need both.

 Kenny D-S ‏@Kipplewinker 
#AskRuby What is your favourite silent movie? #unusualquestionputtoacelebrity

“The Artist” .  You didn’t even realize no one was moving their lips with no noise coming out.

2 Comments

#AskRuby 10 May 2014

10/5/2014

2 Comments

 
Here's the latest #AskRuby in full.  You can get involved by tweeting @rubywax and using #AskRuby

Kourosh Newman-Zand ‏@KouroshSense 
@Rubywax #AskRuby Have/Would you use technology (hardware or software) to practice mindfulness?

It would be better to learn mindfulness from an authentic, living 3d human who can answer questions.  To practice, I listen to CD’s of Mark Williams (a founder of MBCT) to remind me how to pay attention and bring me back from my mind nagging me to death.

 John Marshall ‏@MrFrugii
"@Rubywax: #AskRuby" Do you like ice cream? X

I’m scared of ice cream. If I take one hit of it I’ve got to finish the carton. It’s junkie behaviour.

 Dawn Rees ‏@ReesDawn 
@Rubywax #AskRuby by what practical means might we effectively challenge #socialmedia impact on childrens #mentalhealth?

Burn celebrity magazines if any in the house or any other magazine that makes a normal person feel inferior.

 HRH cjjosh ‏@cjjosh 
@Rubywax Do you have a routine to keep stable - and do you become completely sick of that routine? #AskRuby

I have no routine at all besides brushing my teeth.  If I start to get into a “I should have, I didn’t, I’m a looser” state wherever I am,  I will (even for a few minutes) try to anchor myself by sensing my breath going in and out or sending my focus to sound, just listening.  That cools my engines.

 Paul Carder ‏@paulcarder 
Yes @rubywax : Q: are we getting much closer to being able to talk openly about #mentalhealth in the #workplace without stigma? Thx #AskRuby

I feel there’s a change in the wind coming as far as openly discussing mental illness at work.  I hope very soon it will become illegal to discriminate against mental illness just as it is for a physical disability. Free at last. Free at last. 

 Lynne ‏@lfmartin10 
@Rubywax #askruby how would you spend your fantasy 24hrs?

Asleep.

 James. ‏@JamesCole96 
@Rubywax Will you be releasing your show 'Sane New World' on DVD or CD at all? I found it so so useful! :-) :-) #AskRuby

“Sane New World” (the book) is out in audio if you can’t find it come back to me I will whip the appropriate person responsible.

 Morag Wycherley ‏@momes_cpn 
@Rubywax #AskRuby what's your opinion on the current state of mental health services? X

Not very impressive.  Where or where will you find someone who A. understands the right drugs to perscripe for specific disorders. B. If you find a good therapist, tell me.

2 Comments

#AskRuby 25 April 2014

25/4/2014

2 Comments

 
Here's the latest #AskRuby
(You can take part each week by tagging your questions on twitter with #AskRuby)

1. @harchie12: @Rubywax what irritates you most about a theatre audience?

You must know what I’m going to say; when they don’t laugh. I think, “Well I’m laughing and that’s all that matters.” A woman passed out during my show once I didn’t love that either.

2. @boxoffrogs16: @Rubywax #askruby do you have a cd/download/ youtube to help with mindfulness all my mh team gave me was 3 page A4 script it impossible !

You can’t learn anything on 3 pages. Tell them they wasted the paper.

3. @mimidaz: @Rubywax #askruby dear Ruby, do you know of any study or practise of MFness and gardening? Or "outdoor MFness"?thx

Mindfulness is only about being in a state of ‘paying attention’ to whatever is going on ‘in the moment.’ So you can be mindful doing anything if you choose to; cleaning your teeth, picking a weed and even going to the loo. If you’re really tuned into the sensation of a liquid leaving your body - that’s mindfulness.

4. @swishperson: @Rubywax wondered if you've ever tried EFT. Is it useful for depression and how does it fit in with mindfulness? X

If you google EFT it’s about clearing your short circuit in the body’s bioenergy system.
The positive results of mindfulness in terms of depression are based on hard scientific evidence. “Show me the science” is my motto; if I can’t see it, smell it or taste it, for me it won’t work.

5. @maternalocd: @Rubywax Who gave you your courage, Ruby? Was it an eclectic group over time or one person?

No one gave me any courage. I doubt it’s even giveable. I was told I ‘d never get anywhere as a child, if that isn’t fuel for making you push even harder no matter how fearful or humiliating the situation nothing is.
2 Comments

#AskRuby 11 April 2014

11/4/2014

0 Comments

 
Here is Friday's #AskRuby in full

1. @maternalocd: @Rubywax #askruby We know OCD folk don't harm but was Shakespeare trying to describe OCD handwashing or PTSD with rituals in Lady Macbeth?

Both. I’m sure that’s what he meant when he said “Out damn spot.” My mother used to say that when I dropped some crumbs on the floor. I would drop some of my cookie (an invisible amount) and she would leap across the room like Superman with two sponges and wipe like a possessed person. This is how I know how mad the Macbeth woman was.

2. @leadworkshop: @Rubywax A brilliant and very unique show in 
Newark tonight! Can you recommend a book on Neuroscience?

Yes my book; it’s funny and easy to read. You can buy it on Amazon or your near-by bookstore. I would highly recommend it.

3. @GaryDunne: @Rubywax What's your working definition of 
#mindfulness? #askruby

It’s being aware or paying full attention, in the moment while holding back any judgment or self-critical thinking. Just noticing something without the endless commentary that plays in your head.

4. @lorrie_e: @Rubywax As before. How you hide the deeper issues behind comedy. Are you still doing this Ruby?

No comedy is no contraceptive against mental illness. When I’m sick I’m sick and when I’m well and funny they are two separate states of mind.

5. @michaelteehee: @Rubywax is mental health treated better in Britain than America?

I think in Britain it’s more talked about. I don’t think in middle America many things are discussed outside getting some cheese hot dogs and a bucket of French fries.
0 Comments

#AskRuby 27 March 2014

27/3/2014

1 Comment

 
Here are the answers to today's #askruby in full

1. @DEVILSLOUNGEBAR: @Rubywax are you coming back to Australia? Be great to see you again #AskRuby

Yes I want to go back so much to do Sane New World I won’t even need a plane I will canoe there using my hands as paddles.

2. @AdamWitcombe81: @Rubywax Do you find that you have a certain behaviour that lets you know you're going downhill or is it completely controlled now #askruby

I know I’m going downhill when I start counting how many people I think like me and I can only come up with 3. I then decide those 3 probably like me because either they’re stupid or they feel sorry for me. This is the beginning of my descent. It is not controlled.

3. @gary_enefer: @Rubywax how do you deal with rudeness or being blanked?I have depression and people get annoyed or ignore me if I can't do things their way.

You may be imagining it because when you are depressed it feels like the whole world is blanking you. When you’re well again and they blank you and you know it tell them to ‘fuck themselves’. They’ll probably like you more.

4. @SamiMtt: @Rubywax ab fab movie. Anytime soon?

When Jennifer Saunders awakes from her coma. Many of us have not heard from her and this probably means she’s thinking about it. She is a genius and must not be disturbed.

5. @Merlotburmese: @Rubywax #askruby You don't make much 
reference to meditation in your book, how much is it part of your
routine?

Mindfulness is based on meditation but adapted for the Western world. I use it to deal with stress, depression, an anti-dote to bombardment of bad news and all the digital viagra and as an exercise to be able to focus my attention on what I want it to focus on and not on what I don’t. 

6. @FiveFrogsBlog: @Rubywax hi Ruby. I'd love to know what fears you have. What scares you? #AskRuby 

A journalist once asked me that and I said, “Death” and she said “Any particular reason?” You can’t top that one either death or the answer.
1 Comment

#AskRuby 20 February 2014

20/2/2014

0 Comments

 
Here are the #AskRuby questions and answers in full 

1. @MiTz44: @Rubywax I have always wondered Is it possible to totally be free from mental illness?

With anything you can suddenly be totally free and who knows why? I would say it depends what you have and how bad you have it or is that too obvious to say? I am free of depression now but I don’t want to get too cocky it may jump me tomorrow.

To me the most I hope for, for people who have it is they find the right medication there is no shame in taking them. 

2. @MiTz44: @Rubywax If yes - what form of therap(ies) would you suggest? #AskRuby

I would run to your local bookshop or order on Amazon my book, “Sane New World” I give great suggestions otherwise I wouldn’t have written it.

3. @SuzieWelsh: @Rubywax #askruby Im very interested in helping others using Mindfullness. How do I go about it? Im practising it at moment and love it X

You need to get a certificate in teaching mindfulness. I’m sure you can google where to get accredited I chose Oxford mostly cause I liked the outfit. 

4. @joyfactoryuk: @Rubywax Hey Ruby, your book was so helpful to me in my last episode. Can you tell me which 8-week mindfulness course you recommend? Ta! 

I would go to Chris Cullen who works at Oxford University just get in touch with the office for mindfulness. He is the guy I think is Mark William’s disciple though he’d kill me for saying it.

5. @mirandasmurmurs: What's been the highlight of your time in Cape Town / the opening of your new show @Rubywax ? 

Doing my show “Sane New World” and having 2 people in the audience ask me if I was doing the show with my fly down on purpose. I screamed “Why didn’t you tell me during the show?”

6. @kmoggie: @Rubywax What did your family do that made the biggest difference ? #askruby

Not my parents but my kids still loving me even though they knew mommy was broken.
0 Comments

#AskRuby 19 December 2013

19/12/2013

0 Comments

 
Here are the answers in full to last week's #AskRuby

1. How do/did your friends (who don't suffer) support you during 
your depression?
via @_0rladox

I didn’t tell them. I was too ashamed to mention it, I thought they’d think, “What a wanker she has so much and now complains she can’t lift herself from the bed.” I would agree with them but I was mentally incapacitated.

2. What are your thoughts on behavioral addictions not being included in DSM IV? 
via @Scrimmers
Just to enlighten the confused, all psychiatric diagnoses are categorized by the DSM IV meaning Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorder and this is the most recent edition. Not that long ago the DSM said being gay was a pathology; imagine them all on anti-gay meds; there goes Broadway musicals out the window. 

We all have a little bit of everything and everyone one of us is as different as a fingerprint so how can you categorize us when our minds go wrong? We aren’t like cans of Campbell Soup where you can say, “She’s chicken noodle and he’s a minestrone.” (I hope you see where I’m going with this). 

3. Is humour the best medicine?

It’s a good one but not as good as xanax. 

4. As crisis counsellors, we manage vicarious trauma -how can we get employers to offer support without viewing it as weak? 
via @0dds0cks

Give them the shock of their life or send them into a war zone and ask them for support again, this time they’ll listen.

5. Any chance of you doing a show in NYC? 
@JustaFreckles

I would fly there without a plane but who can compete with “Book of Mormons?” 

6. Any plans to reunite with the "Girls on Top" ladies?
via @molodyko 

Are you out of your mind? If you saw that show now you would never speak to me again, it does not age well. It was like having a slumber party with crazy people on TV. Now they’d make you rehearse and actually learn lines, back then we just showed up and made each other laugh.
0 Comments
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