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On Depression - A Suggestion

16/4/2014

8 Comments

 
I'm wary about harping on about depression. People glaze over; you can see them thinking, 'Oh here she goes again, jawing on about "the darkness".' Once you couldn't say 'gay' and before that it was the 'C' word and further back you couldn't even mention you were a witch - depression is the latest taboo.

And this isn't something that happens to a small minority, it's up to one in four of us, so where is everyone? If it's not you it's probably a relative or a friend - everyone knows someone. When Hamlet says, 'O, that this too too solid flesh would melt thaw and resolve itself into a dew!' That's got to be one of the most accurate descriptions of depression. (If a shrink heard you say that he'd have you on meds in seconds.) Part of the stigma lies in the fact that the word 'depressed' depicts a kind of 'down in the dumps' sentiment. Sadness or unhappiness is perfectly normal if something has not turned out the way you wanted it to or someone has died. 

Depression is a whole other beast; it is not situation appropriate but when you find the old you is gone and has been replaced by a block of cement; to move is unimaginable. The voices in your head, however, are belting you- like bombs, incoming over Dresden - so loud, so relentless you get not one voice but about 100,000 abusive voices; like if the Devil had Tourette's. Depression doesn't care if you're famous, live in a mud hut or what culture you come from, it just loves everyone.

Those of you who do suffer know that we just need to look in each other's eyes and we recognise that we have the 'illness'. It's like a secret handshake. You can read depression loud and clear if you look into the eyes of a sufferer; there's no mistaking it, it's the look of a dead shark.

WE ARE NOT ALONE
What helps if you have depression is realising that you are not alone, that this 'illness' actually exists like any other physical illness; you are not making it up and you are not some self-indulgent, self-obsessed narcissist who's looking for pity or an excuse not show up at work or school. Find someone who shares your pain. Go and locate what I call a 'fucked buddy' - someone you can always call, day or night, when you can't take it anymore.

If you talk to people who don't understand they will nod and say how sorry they are and tell you to try and get better but they cannot feel it and will eventually get bored or, in extreme cases, leave you. (So many people have told me that they've been abandoned when they were in the depths of depression.) If you find someone who has what you have, they will never get bored; they will talk drugs, voices and heartache with you till the cows come home. They will relate and resonate with you, holding your hand through the agony.

My Suggestions (A Diatribe) 
Alcoholics Anonymous has a system where you call your 'buddy' when you feel you want a drink and they will talk you down. Why can't we have meeting places like in AA, where they all get together for their 12-step thing and have cigarettes and cookies? How did they organise these get-togethers so well? They have meeting places on every corner of every block; more places than there are Starbucks and these people are drunks? How did they figure all this out? Why can't we do that? We're just as discriminated against as alcoholics; if you ever write that you suffer from a mental disorder on your CV, good luck ever landing a job. If you run a company and you've taken off more than six months because of a mental problem, you're fired. It should be against the law, just as it is with someone physically disabled.

The gays turned it around in my lifetime, now they're everywhere: politicians, CEOs, generals, lords, hairdressers... Let's go find where they keep their old rainbow banners, high-heels and tutus that they wore during their gay parades, put them on and march to parliament with pitch forks screaming, 'WE ARE MENTALLY ILL, WE ARE THE ONE IN FOUR AND PROUD. CHANGE THE LAWS. WE ARE LIKE EVERYONE ELSE.' Take it or leave it. My political rant is over.

I'm on the road talking about how I use mindfulness in my Sane New World tour until the end of May. There are still a few tickets left in Cornwall, Dartford and Watford!




8 Comments
Sandra
21/4/2014 07:22:54 am

thank you

Reply
arwen garza
23/8/2020 06:07:36 am

get your ex back with a love spell that works fast.
Dr.Jumba   has helped thousands of women get their Ex boyfriends back using his real effective love Spell. After my boyfriend of one year broke up with me, I could barely speak without crying. I felt blindsided and didn't know what to do. I didn't know if I could get him back and the anxiety was unbearable. I needed him back desperately because I loved him so much. So I contacted this great spell caster for help. He helped me cast a return love spell on him and just within 11 hours my boyfriend came back to me crying and begging for my forgiveness. Dr. Jumba released him to know how much I loved and wanted him. And He also opened his eyes to picture how much love we have shared together. As I am writing this testimony right now I am the happiest woman on earth. I want to recommend this great spell caster to anyone that truly needs an urgent solution to a love break up. Email him at   wiccalovespelltools@yahoo.com , wiccalovespelltools@gmail.com  or Call/WhatsApp him:  +19085174108    "I'm so grateful and can say that if you have been broken up with and want to get that person back, Dr.Jumba   is the best! I'll never forget how much he helped me  
  WEBSITE : drjumbaspellhome.wordpress.com blog : https://wiccaspelltools.blogspot.com/ 

Reply
Alanna
21/4/2014 09:49:58 pm

​Dearest Ruby,

Since I was a small child I was always told I'm not good enough; for what you might ask? Well, teachers told me I could never be an actress as I wasn't good enough (well, one teacher said that, therefore I took it as Gospel); I was told I was disruptive in class at the tender age of 6 as I stood up from my old, scribbled upon desk to get up and read the chalk board (I was actually very short sighted and this wasn't discovered until a couple of years later); and I was bullied for my appearance also, mainly from being a late developer and holding onto that puppy fat for dear life (plus a small comfort from Mr. McVities Digestive biscuits, an internal hug).

Time moved on, things changed, I lost weight through bulimia and eating minimal amounts a day (slice of toast, an apple) just because I wanted to be considered as "beautiful" and accepted, whatever these things mean? However, I became confident as was socially accepted for having the jaw-line of Skelator and a butt to match.

I went to University in 2000 and thought I was the bees knees, great, big shiny, awesome bees knees. However, this was brought down with a crash as men started to use me for my looks when I was searching for meaning; this then brought on another bought of depression.

Since all of these things I have had my ups and my downs. The black cloud sweeps in and rains on my parade, sometimes without warning; a crash in my heart and in my head. These feelings have since become more anxious than depression. "I don't look nice today", "Why don't I look like that 22 year old barmaid", "I'm not fun, where did 'fun me' go?", "I'm sure that person was talking about me". Even though I can sit and look at my computer screen now and go "Hang on, these things are ridiculous, pick yourself up lady cakes, you're looking fine today and as for fun, well, you have bags of that shit!", my heart has this horrible sinking feeling of "Meh".

I'm currently reading your book and every sentence I read, I'm sat there chuckling out loud and nodding to everything you say, the feelings you have, the doubts you have/ had. It's nice to be able to read a book which isn't asking you to talk to your spirit fairies or invest in some magic potion to help diminish the feelings of fear, rejection, doubt etc which have mostly been brought to fruition from modern society (I feel). You say it like it is with your stunning wit and intelligence and you've given me a new hope and faith that not everyone wants to be speeding through life judging popularity by tweets and Facebook 'Likes', or pictures of peoples 'highlight reels' (I had a bad-ass duck stew I made for dinner last night, but didn't want to show off about it by taking a picture with 50 filters through it).

I really hope I can get to see you on tour. Keep it up. You're fabulous x

Reply
Depression link
3/5/2014 09:48:13 am

If we can all talk about depression, we may make some important advances in treatment. I know it always feels better to share my feelings with someone close, but many people don't have that and they just keep their depression to themselves.

Reply
Tom
15/10/2017 11:29:41 am

It's back again. That demon who threatens to overturn my relationship, my job, my health. That insidious monster, the result of years of sexual interference, shaming, name calling and bullying. I'm supposed to be gentle with myself now in these dark days but I can't find anything to love. I just see a miserable freak. I'm too afraid to knock on my friend's door, to call anyone in my family because I feel they will sense the ugliness of me, the worthlessness of me. I'm terrified to even go to the local store to buy groceries. People can sense it and run away, rolling their eyes, staring as they pass at my embittered face with that fascinated look as if they are witnessing the scene of a terrible accident.Not long ago I was laughing somewhere, springing down the street. What has happened to me? Will I ever get back to that person? I've just sent a prayer for forgiveness, healing and for light. Is there really a divine light somewhere just waiting for me to invite it in. If so then fill me up, do it, melt away this stupid, pointless cancer of the mind and soul...

Reply
arwen garza
23/8/2020 06:08:02 am

get your ex back with a love spell that works fast.
Dr.Jumba   has helped thousands of women get their Ex boyfriends back using his real effective love Spell. After my boyfriend of one year broke up with me, I could barely speak without crying. I felt blindsided and didn't know what to do. I didn't know if I could get him back and the anxiety was unbearable. I needed him back desperately because I loved him so much. So I contacted this great spell caster for help. He helped me cast a return love spell on him and just within 11 hours my boyfriend came back to me crying and begging for my forgiveness. Dr. Jumba released him to know how much I loved and wanted him. And He also opened his eyes to picture how much love we have shared together. As I am writing this testimony right now I am the happiest woman on earth. I want to recommend this great spell caster to anyone that truly needs an urgent solution to a love break up. Email him at   wiccalovespelltools@yahoo.com , wiccalovespelltools@gmail.com  or Call/WhatsApp him:  +19085174108    "I'm so grateful and can say that if you have been broken up with and want to get that person back, Dr.Jumba   is the best! I'll never forget how much he helped me  
  WEBSITE : drjumbaspellhome.wordpress.com blog : https://wiccaspelltools.blogspot.com/ 

Reply
Lee Wang
12/9/2020 09:18:29 pm

Hi, this is real testimony of a spell doctor who helped me bring back my lover , who broke up with me. i had lost all hope about my fiance coming back home but thanks to Dr Aigbomian who help me bought my fiance back if you're going through this same problem kindly email Dr Aigbomian on this draigbomianspellcaster@gmail.com his WhatsApp number
+2347040843115.

Reply
Bella George
1/12/2020 08:36:59 am

HOW I GOT MY HUSBAND BACK WITH THE HELP OF DR JUMBA  CONTACT ON WHATSAPP NUMBER +1 (908) 517 4108 

This is my testimony about the good work of Dr Jumba who help me....  am sorry for putting this on net but i will have to, by this world best spell caster that brought back my husband who left me out for past 3 years, i eventually met this man on a blog site posting by one of is client for help, i explained everything to him and he told me about a spell caster that he had heard about and he gave me an email address to write to the spell caster to tell him my problems. In just 2 days, my husband was back to me. I just want to say thank you to this truthful and sincere spell caster, sir all you told me have come to pass and thank you Dr Jumba  . Please I want to tell everyone who is looking for a solution to their problems, I advise you to kindly consult Dr Jumba  , he is real,he is powerful and whatever the spell caster tells is what will happen, because all what the spell caster told me came to pass. You can kindly contact him on whatsapp : +1 (908) 517 4108 or email him : wiccalovespelltools@gmail.com  .  website :  https://drjumbaspellhome.wordpress.com/

Reply



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